Whether it’s a scrapbook or a storybook, an adoption story is a great way to help your child understand their adoption. It can be filled with pictures of family, friends, and the places you have visited as a family. It can also include keepsakes from your child’s birth mother such as plaster hand prints, cards and notes, drawings, or even a piece of clothing that was worn by their birth mom.
The most important thing is to start talking about adoption with your child early on and to be prepared to answer their questions as they arise. Some kids will ask a lot of questions, but others may be more quiet and you might have to look for creative ways to engage them in the topic.
For example, our youngest daughter has a wonderful relationship with her birth father and hearing her adoption story directly from him gave her much comfort and understanding about her adoption reality. That was a healthy way to facilitate her adoption story, and a large part of his own healing as well.
In the end, your child’s attitude toward their adoption will depend in large part on how you handle the conversation. If you are closed off or evasive, they might turn to other sources such as their friends or even the Internet for information and perspective on the topic. If you are open and honest, your child will be able to build an emotional connection to their adoption story, which is a fundamental element of becoming a loving, happy, and confident adult.
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